learning from others

Ivan picks up on so much and imitates everything, which is good and not so good. He saw a friend of our's daughter climb up on his train table, so a few nights later, there he was sitting on his table. She didn't teach him how to dismantle it, he has that mastered already! We look forward to the day when he tries to build things and put them together instead of always tearing apart, but you have to start somewhere. In the meantime, I'm excited that he will put things away in the garbage (most of the time) and help pick up (on occasion).

We don't do much tv watching, but when we visit one of our adopted grandparents (Big Buddy), he always has the tv on. Tonight one of Brian's favorites was playing: Criminal minds. I try to shield Ivan from the gore and intensity as we attempt to visit over the roar (Big Buddy is partly deaf, so the tv is really loud), but to my horror Ivan glanced as some guy chocked to his death on tv, Ivan threw his head back and stuck out his tongue and made chocking noises like the man! Maybe I could turn this into an opportunity to teach him the universal sign for chocking??? Yuk, sometimes, most times, I have tv.

Ivan has really taken to books and has gravitated to a dozen books in particular. Here is another adopted grandparent who came to visit. Ivan decided she would be a good reader and brought her one of his favorite books. Maybe he has a sixth sense about teachers, because he did the same with another teacher friend another night. He had her reading a good 20 minutes I'm sure, maybe he knew this was her specialty (she teaches teachers to teach reading- got it?)

It's beautiful to see Ivan pick up the good around us and I'm seeing more and more it's up to us to help him filter the bad. We know lots of people who homeschool, and while that is a long way off for us and we may change our minds, we tend toward a different philosophy. In our eyes, we are called to be involved, to be relational and to be different all at the same time. We take him in homes some people wouldn't go to because we love the people there and hope to teach Ivan to see past the exterior, the language or behaviors and realize we are all the same in the end. We all have hurts and victories and show it in different ways.

We've learned a lot from "the poor". They may not keep their homes like I do, talk like I do and may do a lot of things differently than I do, but so many of them love so much more, give so much easier and know how to celebrate life without all the material trappings I hold too dearly to. Some of these lessons are the most important in life, and what better place to learn it than among those who truly live it- sometimes you have to see through the harsh rudeness in life to behold it's greatest treasures.