Chewy nuggets, vol.2

I read a quote on a newsletter I subscribe to. I forget who the author was and I'm sure I'm saying it all different, but if I can remember and follow the advice, I will become a much better person. This is something I am SUPREEMELY bad at and have only come to understand in the last few years. The advice was this...

Listen to understand, don't listen to answer.

Pierce me in the heart and reconfigure my entire being! I hate how hard it is to change myself and also how I always think others should change easily. This is a biggie for me. I want to listen to understand and to know and to love and to empathize, not a small task. I think this got harder in a way when I became a mom, because you have to find answers and teach and direct. But I don't want to be bossy or a dictartorship either. I want to actually hear my children, husband, friends... I think this will teach Ivan even more than if I always have an answer.


On another note, I did UNDERSTAND Ivan's body language when he had his first encounter with a bird (our neighbor brought it over). At first he thought it was great. He would pat it (a little too roughly) and it would run away. He looked at it and watched it climb up my shoulder. Then when my neighbor had it, it flew down to me and caught me off guard, making me squeal. I was surprised, but Ivan was terrified. It was like one of those America's funniest videos clips where the kid goes hysterical. I put my hand on him to calm him and he must have thought the bird had landed on him, because he flipped out and screamed and cried and wanted to crawl into my lap. I had never seen sheer terror on his face before like that, (well, unless you count the time he crunched down on a jalapeno- our mistake). That time, he made gestures for us to remove his innerds, tried to crawl out of the high chair and hurl himself into my lap, like I can fix everything! I guess Ivan already had his first lessons that just because I'm a mom doesn't mean I know everything!