Tuesday, September 09, 2008

Mourning

They did a c-section on my friend, who lost her baby at about 30 weeks and she is now resting and trying to recover on the many levels where she is wounded. The nurses brought the baby to the family and I was privileged to be there while some women took pictures for them and as we gazed at the infant's beauty. I wrote this out of the pain I felt for my friend and her loss.

Cries-a-lot
Gazes into her pot of sorrow
Tears cascading down her face
Causing her filled cauldron to overflow
Threatening to drown her

Haunting images flitter across the salty surface
Her small lifeless baby
Too small, too still
The immovable death sentence
Crushing her hopes, dreams and joy
In a single blow

Her arms are empty
Her home is quiet in the awkward stillness of mourning
Her mind is in shock and turmoil
Her heart twisted mercilessly
By her great love that spills out as endless tears

Her cries turn heavenward
Where each mutter, each groan, each tear, each cry
Usher in the baby's precious soul to her heavenly home
She is carried in by this love bleeding forth from hearts on earth
The Lover carefully and tenderly receives and embraces
The passion of His heart, the beautiful soul come so quick
Along with the intense heartache
He draws them to Himself and says "little one, you are dearly loved"

The Lover and infant daughter
Carefully wrap each note of mourning sent heavenward
They kiss them until they melt into a fine powder
They smell in their fragrance, marvel at the great love
And tremble under the depth of sadness
They stir in their own offerings of love:
Heavens laughter, eternity's hope, perfect love from a perfect realm
And blow back their remixed potion as responses to the cries of earth

Cries-a-lot can barely see past the chasm of darkness
The despair and heart wrenching pain
But sometimes a glimmer of hope assails her heart
She imagines a presence, a child's voice that sings
"I'm not so far, Cries-a-lot, just beyond the veil
Receive our love back to you
And know that one day all will be well"

The Lover wipes Cries-a-lot's tears
Carefully treasuring the pure love and heartache
Just as she carefully carries the baby's fragile shell
The remains
Buried in earth's ground
Along with a sprinkling of heaven's rain

He stirs her pot of sorrow with heaven's tears
Of compassion, hope and love
So that sometimes she is overcome with peace
And the incomprehensible knowledge
Under such depth of pain
That she is dearly loved

2 comments:

Olivia said...

My tears join you tonight. I have praying for her and you a lot today as Tighe called to tell me she is offically in heaven. Thank you for being there for her. It must have been hard for you to. Seeing a lifeless baby should never happen. Innocence should live. I love you and thank God for you Angela, that you chose to love you friend as well as this sweet baby girl who passed away.

Kimberley said...

I feel for your friend. As you know it's hard to lose a baby. I wish that no one ever had to feel that pain. I will be keeping her and her family in my thoughts.